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Relationships Matter

Relationships Matter

Disclaimer:  This story took place over 30 years ago when segregation was much more prevalent.  These details are critical to the point of the story, so please don’t be offended. I am NOT a racist person.

I remember as a young child sitting in the hot car with my family while Mom ran into the hospital to visit a young black girl with a newborn baby from her vocational tech class. I was very annoyed as we were on the way to my grandmother’s house, and, I didn’t understand why Mom felt compelled to do something for somebody she would probably never see again.

A few years later, Mom started running an insurance debit route. This was obviously a long time ago when agents collected insurance premiums every week and submitted payments to the home office on the policyholder’s behalf. The district manager was taking Mom around and introducing her to her new clients on the route assigned to her. And, of course, her route included a neighborhood where white people stood out like a sore thumb. Because we lived in a dry county, it was bootleggers’ haven.

One place we visited was a black bar in the heart of a black neighborhood where white folks were not welcome.  Segregation was still prevalent although laws had been passed to stop it.  Mom said the bar was filled with all types of women in provocative and scanty attire, and she was very anxious about walking into the bar. We never drank anything stronger than iced tea, which was another reason Mom was uncomfortable.

When the bar owner heard my mother’s name, she jumped over the bar and landed right in front of my mother. Mom did not know what to expect.   The bar owner asked, “Are you that white woman that brought my grandbaby a gift to the hospital?”

Mom replied, “If your daughter is Jane, (not her real name), then yes, I did. I didn’t know that was your daughter. She was in my vo-tech class.”

The bar owner thanked my mom for her kindness and put the word out that nobody was to mess with my mother. If they did, they would answer to the bar owner.

This was my first major lesson in why relationships matter. We never know when an act of kindness will come back to us.

Another situation happened to me as a young adult.  I was working for a manufacturing company in the traffic department.  Because of the daily conversations I had with various transportation vendors, I often heard inside information through daily conversations.  One day, my contact shared that they were anticipating an upcoming strike that would negatively impact our shipping habits.  I shared this information with my manager, and we diverted half of our shipments even though there was no other indication of the strike. Sure enough, the carrier went on strike.  And, my company saved significantly as a result of the relationship I had with another peer on the vendor’s side of the business.

Again proving that relationships matter.

What kind of relationships do you have with others?

 

The Magic of Success

The Magic of Success

When I was a kid, I used to think that success came easy to those who worked hard.  As I’ve gotten older and become an entrepreneur myself, I’ve learned that success does not magically appear. There’s a lot of hard work that goes into becoming a success.  Hard work is not a bad thing at all.  After all, anything worth doing usually has hard work involved in the process.

However, hard work alone does not make one a success. Are you ready for what the real secret to success is? The key word is consistency.  Consistency is not an exciting word. Consistency alone does not get us motivated and jumping for joy.  Nonetheless, it is a key ingredient in achieving success.

So, how does one become consistent?   As a business owner, I’m just trying to keep the business in the black.  Oftentimes, we business owners are working long hours to make it happen.    We keep doing the same thing every day without any thought as to how this same activity Is helping us to grow our business.   We are oftentimes so far in the weeds that we cannot truly see where we are off track.

What can we do to become more consistent in achieving success? First, we need to take time to grow ourselves.  So, how do we grow ourselves?  That’s a little harder question, isn’t it?  John Maxwell says we should take time to consider these four questions:

  1. Do you know what you need to improve?
  2. Do you know how you are supposed to improve?
  3. Do you know why you want to keep improving?
  4. Do you know when you are supposed to improve?

“Your future is dependent upon your personal growth.  Improving yourself daily guarantees you a future filled with possibilities.  When you expand yourself, you expand your horizons, your options, your opportunities, your potential.” (John C Maxwell)

Start with setting goals that are necessary but also achievable. Get really good at doing the basics, then do them every day.  Those small basic steps repeated every day eventually lead to great achievements. That’s what consistency is truly about.

It doesn’t mean the journey is easy.  In fact, it is usually difficult before it becomes easy.  One may feel uncomfortable in the process.   The truth is that we achieve our daily goals by doing those things that are uncomfortable.

“These daily uncomfortable things become habits.  Habits turn into actions and then into attitudes and then lead into lifestyles.” (Charlene Armitage)

Consistency is not easy. To be honest, just achieving goals alone won’t make you successful. It’s about growing yourself.  That includes believing in yourself and the potential that is in you. I encourage you to consistently put in the work and keep believing in yourself.

Excerpt from The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth by John C Maxwell.